This year I’ve learned that there are men that are kind, thoughtful and patient. I’ve learned that not all men are one step above a caveman, throwing out demands and using women. Two years ago I thought I had it figured out. I thought men were these different creatures with different rules than women. I held them up to different standards than I held myself. Now I know better.
Now I’ve known a man that can calmly deal with minor inconveniences and some big ones too. I’ve known a man that thinks about things other than sex. I’ve known a man that makes an effort to see me with intentions that don’t necessarily include sex. I’ve known a man that puts others before himself, is selfless and caring.
Incredibly I’ve known a man who wants to impress me with his self-control and ability to improve himself. I’ve known a man that is honest, sometimes painfully so. I’ve known a man who reads passages to me in books that he finds amusing, touching or inspiring.
Finally I’ve known a man that includes me in his life, says he had a better time doing something because I was there. I’ve known a man that tells me I’m an awesome, incredible person. I’ve known a man who decides, maybe for first time in his life, to give a committed relationship a try.
For all these things I will be eternally indebted to my boyfriend of the last year. Whatever happens between us I can see that my standards have been raised. I will be demanding and not satisfied with anyone who is less respectful, kind and honest. I will require my partner to be someone who chooses to do things with me and shares my interests.
The bar has officially been raised.